NSFW crashouts, hot takes, and fans behaving badly.
Welcome back to the most srs thing on the internet: college athletics. That peculiarity of American sports that makes grown men (and a few women), meltdown at the slightest imperfect performance. And, God forbid that Hometown U loses — then the meltdowns flow.
Today’s edition could honestly be as long as War and Peace, given all of the great weltschmerz we’ve been served up. You’ve seen the usual hot takes. So, I went far afield to find this week’s candidates for suzerainty of misery.
Disclaimers follow: The Meltdown frequently features naughty language or imagery that is offensive, beyond the pale, replete with -isms and -ists and -phobias, and other displays of inhumanity that are NSFW. If morons like that bother you, here’s an alternate site to consider.
Otherwise, you’ve been warned.
Oklahoma
Only one team has held a 17–0 lead in the College Football Playoffs and lost. That team is Oklahoma…who has now done it twice. LOL. They also became the first team to lose on their home field. I guess those Many Men weren’t Hard To Kill after all, eh?
People were pissed off at Mateer, at Ben Arbuckle (OC), at John Mateer, at their defense. I would be too, honestly. It was like watching the 2010 Iron Bowl, but as the evil invaders this time.
Fuck you Venables you fucking Nazi… Get Oklahoma out of the Sec
Venables should be fired… what a fucking idiot. CHOKELAHOMA!
Fuck this Crypt Keeper lookin mf
Ben Arbuckle was too busy gooning in twitter spaces instead of preparing his team for the playoffs
I’m sueing the entire program for emotional trauma expect to hear from my lawyers
Fucking team of idiots
go back to Uber Eats man this shit ain’t for you
What a bunch of phony pussies
“No targeting the Quarterback’s feelings, and unlimited eligibility if you were enrolled during Covid” is the clause requiring Oklahoma to spectacularly choke away a 17 point lead in the CFP every 8 years
BV US A LOOSER
Launch Oklahoma to the fucking sun. Congrats Brent Venables you wont ever get a power 4 head coaching job again.
First team to lose a playoff game at home. First team to lose a 17 point lead. This program builds leaders.
Ben Arbuckle and John Mateer ruined Oklahoma football.
God damn. You sorry motherfuckers are a disgrace to the NCAA. Rot in hell you no talent losers.
These fucking phaggots on defense decided to take an early flight to Cancun apparently!
delete this before yall piss me off deadass
Check Mateer’s Fanduel account
We really doing ‘Hard to kill’ after blowing a 17point lead???? Hahahaha
Mateer gotta be on the take no one can be this bad
We tried but this was an uphill battle before it started. Oklahoma vs Disney, ESPN, the Golden Child Alabama, Refs, and profit of what school brings in the $$$.
What is this faggot twinkletoes shit
Let’s run another draw for 6 inches…. On first down…. Every drive
We need to do something about the great value brand OC and Trevor knight 2.0 before next season.
Chokelahoma. Consistency is key and our name has been earned no doubt.
Brent Venables choosing to kick a 51-yard field goal on 3rd down just for the kick to not even reach perfectly sums up my thoughts on him as a head coach.
A complete disasterclass from top to bottom.
Hold Mateer down & whip him during halftime.
Tell the kicker to tighten up his helmet, and how to wear proper football pants. Otherwise he’ll need a good couple pair of khakis before he starts at Northwestern Mutual next June.
Serious question: Is this the most painful loss of your lifetime?
This right here is what the OU program has become to 0–5 in the playoffs. This is then most embarrassing blue blood program in history and their isn’t a way to save it. This program will be mid for years to come.
What’s a Sooner? The sooner we leave the stadium, the sooner we can forget this loss…
Well they had a good 1.25 quarters I guess. See ya next year
Don’t do this to me again y’all please
You dumb sons of bitches. What the fuck was that.
Please don’t do this to us
We suck again….
I hate football
Alabama
Oh, don’t think ‘Bama fans weren’t melting slap the fuck down either, after getting rolled 17–0 in sixteen minutes of play. Not much wit or pith to be had, just venom. Tide fans were furious at DeBoer, at Simpson, at Jam and Ryan Williams, at Doud…and especially at Ryan Grubb.
Where the fuck did my alabama team go?
Disrespect will be addressed on the field…I hope to never hear that bullsh#t again
I swear to god I would cut anybody who returned a kickoff to the fucking 14 yard line
Fuck Ryan Williams. Fuck Ryan Grubb.
We did not deserve to make the playoffs. Should have saved us the embarrassment and let ND in.
leave all of these mfers on the tarmac
I hate Ryan Grubb with every single fiber of my fucking being, Jfc.
I have never hated a mf this much in my entire life.
This team is so ass offensively.. holy fuck
Must be nice to have recivers that don’t have dick fingers
Grubb and Debore are two cheeks of the same shitty ass
I want bad things to happen to this punter
Pathetic absolutely pathetic offense, fire Ryan Grubb.
Fuck Ryan Grubb and Fuck Jam Miller
Most embarrassing team in history. I have been watching since 1985. Fire that DeBore and Womack.
DeBoer saving his “good” coaching for Ann Arbor
goatee mf is actually retarded
I’m not asking him to win a NC. But I am asking for competent play. Anything positive.
Ryan Grubb got fired from the Seahawks after one season for a reason.
Yeahhhh. Gonna go watch paint dry. I’ll see yall next season. KDB and his wack ass Washington need to get the fuck out of Tuscaloosa by tomorrow morning.
I just want to thank Nick Saban for the great memories. Time to give Nate Oats all the NIL money now and start shifting to round ball. (ED: #BOG)
that phaggot cant catch a cold
Ryan Grubb made a deal with the devil where he’ll only call good plays on 4th down
Simpson couldn’t hit a parked car
I like Deboer’s strategy: make them overconfident so the punter will drop the ball and Mateer will throw it straight to a CB. Very cagey on KDB’s part.
It has to be killing Coach Saban to watch this trash.
Dealing with Alabama being just another solid program rather than dominant like they were before the money changers made dynasties impossible is like dating Sydney Sweeney-caliber girls and now settling for 6’s at best with blue hair and tats.
In Airwreck’s honor #FireKap #Fireroach #Firewhoeverthefuck”coaches” special teams. (ED: Back at you)
Grubb better be fucking gone tomorrow. I never thought I would see our offense looking worse than Bill O’Briens
I’m just sad.
Aggies
Many people had sniffed an air of fraud about Texas A&M once they looked at a schedule that somehow dodged Alabama, Tennessee, Georgia, Vandy, Ole Miss, and damn near most of the top half of the conference. That wasn’t helped once A&M lined up against the Longhorns and got their shit pushed in sideways. But then, when faced with a far more physical Miami team, and realizing that Marcel Reed is as bad as people claimed, that was when Battered Aggie Syndrome walked through the door and back into their lives.
Marcel Reed is a bum talked all that shit to throw a game losing pick at home
Elko only embodies physicality at Golden Corral
Marcel Reed is a fraud! Enjoy playing at Incarnate Word next year buddy
this dude fucking sucks!!! Let me throw a duck as hard as I can to a dude 3 yards away!!!!!!!!! Absolute FRAUDS!!!!!!
Marcel reed is a mossad agent
BAS has gotten so bad that I’m not even upset. Just having a beer and watching Tulane-Ole Miss. The Aggies are we.
Cristobal is the worst game manager I’ve ever seen and Elko was worse today
This bum is 11–9 after halloween
We like defense, but we hate kicking.
I know its bad to judge people by their appearances, but Mike Elko is a fat slob.
how did this bozo not throw 20 interceptions
The level of battered Aggie syndrome resignation may be at an all time high. And I’m going back 25 years here.
What a terrible day to have eyes
we got to stop this gay yelling shit
this isn’t a defensive battle. it’s bad football.
Never, ever tell me I will be cured of battered Aggie syndrome. It is impossible
FUCK MIKE ELKO FOREVER
0–0. Who’s pitching?
Offense sucks dick. Fuck you pussies
Damn Frauds. Mike Elko’s Fatass is a Fraud. Marcel Reed is a Fraud. Collin Klein is a Fraud.
I’d like fewer turnovers, and for Reed to quit his “Conner Weigman shows up drunk” impression.
Battered Aggie Syndrome is a thing. It’s LONG been a thing. I STILL suffer from it. They shoot themselves in the foot & crumble/wilt at the most crucial moments. It’s…tradition.
so we’re a volleyball school now
This game is giving me aids
60 minutes of choking on miami aids dick
niggas all need t o commit seppuku
I knew we were frauds fuck
Notre Dame
Bet you think we’re going to talk about football? Nope. Those hoes declared they weren’t watching the playoffs, and have spent the last week whingeing about hypothetical national titles. Instead, we’re zeroing in on something just as fun: Losing a home game to a Q4 team on the court, as Fort Wayne-Purdue led buzzer-to-buzzer and easily upended the Irish at home, all but ending a bubble bid before ACC play even began.
Losing to a community college.. whole team should be in prison
FIRE SHREWSBERRY! THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!! I’m so mad man
It was fun to a bubble team for 2 weeks in December
This can’t continue. I can’t believe we got yet another quad 4 loss.
And for the 4th straight season we are out of the dance before the start of conference play. This will be the last ND game I watch
Can’t wait for lacrosse season
There are literally no highlights from this disaster.
should have opted out of this game too
Under Micah Shrewsberry I have seen Notre Dame basketball lose to The Citadel, Elon, and Purdue Fort Wayne. Absolutely disgusting.
Hope you boys get lumps of coal in your stockings. You all are bum asses
All employees should strive to have bosses like Micah Shrewsberry
Missed the cfp and then lost to fake purdue
Will we be opting out of the basketball season as well?
The real question is whether Shrewsberry is really just another Brian Kelly but for basketball?
Absolutely fucking disgusting loss burn in hell you fucking losers
Micah Shrewsberry going to crash out in his press conference again?
Another one of our DEI hires falls short
Disband this team and send shrewsberry to the inferno. This is fucking ridiculous
Genuinely just no words. I try not to be negative since we have enough of those “fans” already but holy shit that’s a gross loss
ND is never going to be good at basketball
My Christmas is ruined
Does God hate us?
That’s all for today. We’ll be back after the holiday with ‘Bama hoops, key matchups for the Tide’s Semifinal CFP vs. Indiana, and more.
Have a very Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year. Be safe out there.
Roll Tide
